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The 5 things I most notice when interacting with people who lack empathy are:
1. You do not feel natural human warmth from them. They instead come across a bit cold.
2. They sometimes try to ‘mimic' empathic behaviours, but at best it comes off as a ‘decent act'.
3. They often overcompensate by giving fake smiles, saying nice words, possibly being a bit loud…, but you notice the ‘substance” is missing.
4. You feel they have a personality where they are unable to genuinely ‘relate’ to people. So people wouldn't really want to go to them for advice, or to discuss personal problems etc.
5. They struggle to pick up on signs that other people are sad, worried, in need of someone to talk to… etc.